The “Official” Triple X method post

I needed one central place for the Triple X method to be so I could link back when the need arises. So here it is kids…(doesn’t this feel like when you’re in the car and you started singing “99 Bottles of Beer on the wall” and you get to 92 bottles and you are SO over it?)

Nik’s Triple X method to perfect triple thick shakes every time

Step 1: Load your blender with your liquid base (this assumes milk. It works to thicken water based shakes but it never quite achieves “triple thick” status), protein, and any flavor additives (sugar-free syrup, pudding mix, Splenda, whatever. But not frozen fruit yet).

Step 2: Turn your blender on.

Step 3: Walk away for two minutes. Yes two whole minutes. Trust me this works. Go write a check (preferably to me…kidding…kinda…), check your voicemail, check your e-mail. JUST GO DO SOMETHING FOR TWO MINUTES.

Step 4: Turn blender off. If it has gone long enough you should get a phenomena that I call “Gurgle Pop” wherein a very large air bubble comes to the surface and bursts. The shake will already be thick and creamy looking but it’s not totally there yet.

Step 5: To get it triple thick you gotta add some ice. How much is up to you. I add ice until 2 cubes break the surface of the liquid. But I drink freakishly large protein shakes. So if you have smaller pouch capacity than me (and 98.7% of you do), play around with your amounts and find what works best for you.

Step 6: Blend again on ice crushing mode until your blender begins to purr like a kitten (mmmmm…that thought makes me sleepy…).

Step 7: Pour in glass. Add whippage or anything else as you see fit. Live. Love. Be happy.

K?

SOME DISCLAIMERS:

-Two minutes is a LONG time in blending time. If you have other people in the house who are sleeping and, if you like me have a blender that rivals a jackhammer in decibel power, you might want to plan your escape route before starting this process (shout out to kilmarlic on OH for that tip)

-As I said before, but bears repeating, your shake will be large. Make accommodations! Perhaps go back to that fateful day in kindergarden when your teacher taught you the “s” word…(share, people, share!!! What kinda kindergarden teachers did YOU have?)